My Obligatory Poem about Depression

*An interactive poem*

I’ve been a sad person for my whole life
And I know the workings of being sad.
The hum and drone
and persistent diminuendo.

*reader, please take a deep sigh- for immersion*

You know,
I’m come so far
In the war of attrition with the rival in my mind.

I’ve learned to stay sane
By repeating mantras of cooperation
By having discourse with the apparition.

I told him,

“I know that you are me and that I am you.
That you belong in my brain
and are part of my breath.
I’ve accepted you, took you in like the lost child you are.”

*Now, run your fingers across your brow and pinch the top of your nose and keep them there. Again- for immersion*

“But listen:
Dad needs some alone-time.
And- well, son…
Can’t you obsess over your dolls in the other room?”

*Imagine the child closes the door behind him*

I’ve suspected in recent years
That the kid ain’t so bad.
He inspires me-
Teaches me to maintain a tender heart.

I just wish I could get through to him.
Help walk him through his tantrums,
Convince him that daddy’s never gone too far away.

You see, he merely spies his world;
Knows he don’t quite fit the mould.
And with that tension
He clenches his fists while he sleeps.

He don’t know it, but I run my fingers through his hair
On restless nights.

*Now, run your fingers through your own hair, forehead to neck*

I know you think he’s a problem child,
And he may be.
But he’s also mine.

I’m proud of the kid.
I think there’s a reason he’s in my life.
Maybe to make me humble or wise.
I’ve thought of him as a blessing in disguise-
A very good disguise.

*One more breath. This time to center yourself*

I want to grow past this sadness.
Not to kill him or replace him,
But to give him a kinder name
Than “depression.”

---

From the Author

This is my poem about depression. Every poet has to write one- as them’s the rules.

I think we get depressed when we behave in ways unbecoming to our purpose. And I think people who are continually depressed see that the world itself behaves in a way unbecoming to its purpose.

Depression is unresolved tension. Sometimes that tension can’t be resolved. I used to think that meant that my depression was never-ending spiral downward, but I don’t believe that anymore. Sometimes the pain we feel when we face our darkest thoughts can drive us to seek what light can be found.

Of course, depression also sucks a lot of the time. If you’re suffering, my advice is to talk to a professional. Keep talking to professionals until you find someone who helps you step forward.